What I Meant Was….

In my line of work, I spend a lot of time with my clients talking about their wishes for the future. Who they want helping them, what kind of help they want, where they want their things to go when they pass away.  I spend a lot of time making sure I understand completely what they want so that I can accurately relay that into the legal documents I prepare for them. We spend time talking about contingencies, and then we make sure they take the next steps to match up their beneficiary designations on life insurance policies and retirement accounts to their wishes, and that the way they title their bank accounts won’t interfere with their plans.

I tell my clients that if they don’t take the steps they need to make sure their goals will be carried out, that I may find myself sitting in my office with their children or other family members trying to explain that what they thought their loved ones wanted didn’t actually happen.

“I know my mom wanted all of us to split this life insurance policy” is of little use when she never got around to changing the beneficiary and one child has inherited the entire thing. And doesn’t feel like (or legally can’t) share it.

“I know my father meant for his new wife to share everything with me” but he never took the steps to make sure that would happe.

“I know my sister wanted me to be guardian of her children, so what are they with her husband’s family?”

These are never easy conversations to have and they just increase the pain people are already feeling during a crisis. You aren’t going to be around to explain what you meant to say, so make sure it is clear while you still can.

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